Muriel's trip to India

Summer 2008

Varanasi [City Map] [Time and Weather]---------June 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 |---------Next

Varanasi is closely associated with the spiritual qualities of the river Ganges and has been a religious centre for several thousand years. It is famous for philosophers, poets, writers and musicians as well as a particular style of Hindiustani music.---------[Railway Zones] [Uttar Pradesh - Road Map] [Domestic Aiports]

India Trip

19 June 2008------Back

19 June 2008-----1:04 PM-----------------Bonjour de Varanasi
Je suis au Puja Guest House. Vue fabuleuse sur le Gange et les temples! Singes sur les toits. Chambre avec air conditionne.

Puja Guest House is ideally located on the left bank of the holy river Ganga & Nepali Temple. Here you can enjoy breathtaking views of the Ganga river and the sunrise from the rooms, the balconies or the restaurant facing the river. Enjoy the delicious home-cooked food in the main rooftop restaurant. Rooms are air-conditioned/air-cooled. All of the rooms have attached bath with hot and cold water at all times. Je vais reprendre ma pratique de Yoga des demain sur le toit de l'hotel.

Puja Guest House

---------------------------------------Puja Guest House roof: good for practising Yoga!

19 June 2008-----10:45 PM-----------More from Varanasi
Just bought 2 silk saris.... difficult to resist India! Will wear them all these 3 months! I adore them! I bought them in the same shop where Catherine Deneuve came 10 years ago. But unfortunately my bank account is quite different as hers.... Mmmm...

Been out at 7pm for pujades. Was on a little boat with a guide from the hotel named Gopal. Simply magic. No words for it. The hotel is very near the place where the corpses are cremated. Very sacred place. Very impressive too.

Then I met a flautist who is going to teach me the basic of indian flute. He already showed me a lot. After the magic flute, I was brought in the cave of Ali Baba with all his silk sarees...

19 June 2008-----11:59 PM-----------End of first day in Varanasi
Egit, the Puja Guest House owner is just standing near me! This man is also the man who owns the famous silk saris company! After he sold me the saris, he asked me if I could read for him and spell-check a letter he was sending to Lonely Planet guide where he wishes his guest house to be published. After we finished writing his letter and sent it to Lonely Planet, I showed him this website, including the photos generated from his own website. Egit, the Puja Guest House owner, was very pleased that his site had been discovered. He has created another one that can be found at www.guesthouseinvaranasi.com. This one looks slightly better.

Egit would like Lonely Planet to know how pleased I was to find his Puja Guest House by pure chance. A porter mislead me this morning, and instead of guiding me to the Shanti guest house (which I booked) he led me the Puja Guest House where I am very happy. It is actually a pity that the Puja Guest House is not in the Lonely Planet Guide.

I feel at home here and people are very friendly and lovely and the owner wants me to look more beautiful than Catherine Deneuve. One of the saris will be in very fine turquoise blue silk and the other one is a mix of gold and soft red which suit my pale complexion. In the next two days the little top and petticoat for each of my 3 saris (including the pink cotton one of Delhi) will be made especially for me. Egit will teach me how to wear correctly a sari. It is really great to be encouraged to wear saris by Indians and I now feel quite confident in adopting the Indian style. I also feel a little less guilty to have bought 3 saris now that I know that Indian women possess more than 100 saris! Egit is also advising me the name of a good parfumer here and Gopal will take me there. Rose, santal, jasmine.... pure oils as women traditionnally wore. India is opening its gates to me! This is the beautiful and sensuous India! Such an incredible contrast with the horrible smells and sad pictures of poverty at the train stations and the poor areas of Agra and all India.... My mind and nose are doing the full split the all day long! I need to go to bed because I want to practise my yoga on the roof tomorrow morning and then I plan visit the golden temple and all that you've already put on the website. I will visit my new flute teacher after lunch and will finish the day by another pujade (Indian prayers along the Ganga).
Puja and candles of love and light from the Ganga.

20 June 2008------Back

20 June 2008-----07:23 AM-------------Second day in Varanasi
I had a good night. The a.c did not work, but it should be sorted out. First practice of yoga on roof. Will update blog now and you will know it all... Sorry but I have to keep short as I want to visit and go to the International School of Music where I might find better musicians there. Ravi Shankar is from Varanasi which is a town of art, music and spirituality. Corpes are still burning around...

Ghat	------------------------------------------------------------------------Sunrise from the hotel

20 June 2008-----5:04 PM---------------Second afternoon in Varanasi
I have been visiting to the best perfumer today.... I'll tell more in the blog later because it is soon 7pm, time of puja on Ganga and I want to go because it is just the best time in Varanasi and absolutely fascinating to pray at sunset. I will put again some lotus flower candle for your health! Then flute lesson.... but I have to eat some mangos first!!! I will only eat mangos in Varanasi!

20 June 2008-----5:10 PM--------------Mon arrivee a Varanasi (posted on the second afternoon there)
Enfin a Varanasi. La gare est busy. Je prends un rickshaw pour me rendre au Shanti Guest House. Je traverse le Ganges alors que ma soeur Veronique m'appelle. J'entrevois la beaute du vieux Varanasi qui est a 6 km de la gare. Le rickshaw me depose et je dois prendre un velo-rickshaw pour aller dans la vieille ville. On me laisse pres d'allees etroites et la bien sur un jeune indien offre de me guider et de porter mon lourd sac a dos. Le cycliste me dit que c'est tout et me voila engouffree dans des petites traboules tres etroites larges peut-etre de 3 metres et remplies de petites echoppes, de mini temples avec fleurs, encens et Dieux Hindous, un Ganesh-Dieu Elephant surgit, tout orange et puis un shiva lingam, ce symbole phallique dans un cercle entouree de fleurs. Oui je suis bien a Varanasi.

Banaras Hindu University
Vishwanath Temple

Durga Temple

L'ambiance est totalement differente de Delhi et Agra. Je sens la spiritualite de la ville et quelque chose de tres tres tres ancien et de vraiment mythologique. Je suis saisie. Je tourne et retourne dans des milliers de ces allees et me sens prise dans un labyrinthe et je commence a comprendre que mon porteur m'egare. Il me parle d'un autre hotel. ll me parle de me guider dans Varanasi et je comprends immediatement mon erreur. J'aurais du appeler comme prevu l'hotel Shanti et leur demander d'envoyer un rickshaw. C'est la demarche habituelle et je vois que je me suis fourvoyee mais je me laisse porter par le destin et j'arrive a un autre hotel, le Puja Guest House. Le porteur ne connaissait pas mon hotel.... Je me decide a visiter les chambres du Puja Guest House et decouvre une vue merveilleuse et un tres gentil personnel qui accepte de baisser les prix pour me garder et je me retrouve avec une chambre a moitie prix avec une vue imprenable sur le Ganges et air conditionne! Un jeune homme Gopal offre de m'aider et de m'accompagner le long du Ganges et de prendre un bateau pour me montrer Manikarnika Ghat ou l'on incinere les morts nuits et jours.

View of Ghat

C'est tres emouvant ce contact avec la vie et la mort et de se sentir lie a cette realite qu'on cache trop souvent en occident. Ici c'est ouvert. Les cendres sont ensuite verses dans le Ganges. Cette ceremonie est tres importante pour les Hindous qui esperent obtenir Mukta, liberation et partir quelque part tres haut dans le ciel et les etoiles et echapper au sanskara et au cycle des renaissances. Etre brulee et incinere a Benares pour un Hindou est une grande chance. La vue des grands buchers est tres impressionnante. Les bois sont precieux. Les familles sont reunies autour de chaque bucher. Il est presque 7 heures et nous nous dirigeons vers le Daraswameth Ghat ou se deroule ganga Aarti avec puja, feu et danse. C'est la plus grosse ceremonie de Varanasi.

Temple (Monkey Temple)

----------------------------Dasaswamed Ghat Arthi ceremony

Un ghat est un lieu de ceremonie sur la rive du Ganges. Le paysage est totalement saisissant et envoutant. Les couleurs et les bougies au coucher du soleil ensorcellent et conduisent naturellement vers un etat de meditation et de priere. C'est tres agreable de regarder du bateau. Je lance dans les eaux du Ganges une fleur de lotus avec une bougie et prie pour vous tous... Les pretres sont nombreux. Les rites sont tres anciens, tantriques, tres symboliques. Les musiciens sont au centre. Chanteur s'accompagnant a l'harmonium, tablas (percussions indiennes) et parfois coquillages/trompes. Les pretres sont vetus d'une tunique orange et de larges etoffes flottantes recouvrent leurs jambes. La foule accompagnent les chants en frappant le rythme avec leurs mains. Une foule principalement indienne car il y a tres peu de touristes en ce moment et je n'ai pratiquement pas vu de visages occidentaux depuis que je suis en Inde. C'est la saison chaude et pas vraiment la bonne saison pour visiter l'Inde mais............... les Dieux m'ont souri car la mousson est venue avec moi et les temperatures sont exceptionnellement fraiches pour Juin. J'ai donc beaucoup de chance. La semaine derniere, j'aurais ete un vrai beignet mais maintenant le vent apporte de la fraicheur ainsi que la pluie. Et puis la mousson n'est pas encore a son plein, ce qui me permet de marcher le long du Ganges. Dans un mois, ce ne sera plus possible car les eaux auront monte! En revenant, mon nouveau guide Gopal me parle de sa famille, de ses soucis, des ses 3 soeurs a marier. A 23 ans, toutes ces responsabilites lui incombent. Le pere age de 64 ans ne peut plus travailler et n'a aucune retraite. Son frere a de gros soucis financiers. La famille repose donc sur les freles epaules du gentil Gopal. Beau sourire. Grand yeux orientaux reveurs. Les soeurs a marier sont une grande inquietude. Surtout la soeur ainee qui a 26 ans car a 26 il faut etre marie. Et le pauvre Gopal doit trouver l'argent des dots. Il deplore le systeme mais voila, comment echapper? Il ne veut pas que ses soeurs travaillent car toute aventure avec risque de grossesse pourrait totalement ruiner leur vie. Gopal travaille autant qu'il peut et vit dans l'hotel ou il fait tout. Il se propose de me guider pour mes premieres journees a Varanasi et je sens que son aide me sera bien precieuse. Il me demande d'etre sa mere. Me voila donc avec un fils nomme Gopal! Gopal me met en garde contre tous les faux sadhus, les enfants et toutes les sollicitations auquelles il faut savoir echapper lorsqu'on est touriste. Garder un esprit ouvert tout en etant vigilant et conscient est un veritable exercise de style en Inde! Specialement dans la ville la plus sacree du monde!

20 June 2008-----5:53 PM--------------Meeting with the musician and flautist Lolit!
After my first puja on Manikarnika Ghat at sunset and my magic boat on the Ganges, my new guide Gopal and new son guides me to a musician named Lolit. Lolit lives near the Puja Guest House just behing the orange God Elephant Ganesh. Lolit has a music shop in one of the small very narrow alleys of the old city where I stay at the very heart of the spiritual India. Tablas, sitars, tampurs, flutes, so many different Indian instruments which I did not even know, are everywhere. I take off my shoes. Lolit is a tall strong Indian man, 54, a bit bold, a nice smile but black teeth. Teeth care might not be so easy in India for some.... Lolit shows me a new collection of bamboo flutes and I stay in the shop more than an hour trying all the flute in all the shapes and possible tonalities. Lolit plays. From the left side! Some flutes have such a wonderful warm sensuous sound. The bamboo flute is an instrument of intimacy and breath. Lolit is honest with me. He is first of all a tabla player but he has a feel for the flute. He does not know the art of raga but is happy to show me what he knows. The lesson begins. I bend the notes and I position correctly the fingers on the flute, understanding that Indian flautist do not use their right 4th finger! Lolit invites me to come back and to teach me more..... I will come tomorrow with my own flutes!

20 June 2008-----6:05 PM--------------First practice of yoga on the top of the roof facing the Ganges!
Second day at Varanasi! Long night of sleep. The A/C does not work but I sleep well. The night travelling left me rather tired! 8 o'clock. I take a quick shower and hop I am on the roof of the Hotel facing the Ganges. I lay down my new carpet bought in Agra, a kumi made by villagers. Lovely birds on it and soft pastel colors suiting yoga. I face the sun and the Ganges. I feel very moved to have my first practice of yoga in India such a spiritual place. 8 surya namaskar or salutes to the sun to begin. The air and the practice give all the energy I need for this new day. I finish by a short meditation before the sun becomes hot. Another Indian comes on the roof and makes a short prayer. Tomorrow I will practise earlier. The Brahmins advise me to get up at 5am the right time to practise and play my flute on the roof!

20 June 2008-----6:24 PM--------------The International School of Music of Varanasi
I decide to visit another school of music. The International School of Music of Varanasi is advised by the Lonely planet and I decide to go and check.... My good Gopal guides me in the narrow labyrinthe. Cows sometimes take all the street and you must carefully find your way. It is also important to watch because there are cows shits everywhere.... and God might not always guide your steps! The streets are not always very clean and there are some litters nothing like the horrible smells of Delhi. The chaos has its charms. I follow Gopal who walks fast and try to memorize the street. No street names but I look at the autels and shops... We arrive at the school which is an ashram (community, a musical community in this case). A traditional Hindu family lives in the house. A family of Brahmins and musicians for generations. The houses are built in square with a hole in the center so that you can see what is happening on each floor and from everywhere.... The Brahmin welcomes me. He only wears traditonal dhotis and his upper body is naked showing the thread which the Brahmins hold around their torso. Also although he is not shaved, he has a little bit more hear at the top of the crane. He explains me that students come from all around the world and many instruments are played there. Unfortunately their flute player is touring in Europe. He asks me to play (I came with my F flute) and I improvised something as Indian as I can.... He would have liked to listen to jazz (he plays his tablas with jazz musician) but I haven't brought my silver flute. He invites me to his Saturday concert a 8pm and will introduce me to his brother, a sitar player who could easily introduce me to the art of ragas as I can play the flute. I obviously only want an introduction to classical Indian music and flute and have no ambition to really play Indian flute. I feel very happy to listen and to learn as much as I can. While I am writing those few lines in the hotel, the television behind me is playing bollywood with haunting voices.... Very beautiful too. Indian music loves high voices and clarity.

20 June 2008-----6:31 PM--------------Perfumes of Asia!
After I left the music ashram, Gopal took me to the perfume man. We bought some mangos on the way in the market and visited a man who is one of the best perfume makers of all India. I was introduced in a quiet house with Cows inside, very sacred cows which the owner perfumer takes out at dawn... The owner Rami is another Brahmin and gently me guides me to his laboratory of perfumes. Many bottles and spices. Rami shows me first a blend of massala spices.... then I smell all the most beautiful perfumes I ever ever smell! Pure essential oils of green grass, rose, jasmine, santal, magnolia, gardenia, noos.... He explains to me how the flowers or fruits are collected and then pressed in the country side. I am very impressed by the respect for nature and the non utilisation of chemicals. His essential oils can be used as perfumes, added to oil for massage or be burned for the house. The family keeps its secrets for many generation and the man explains that his son is taking over the business. Perfumes are sold all through India. His grandson is there. A lovely boy very well educated. Such a difference with what I have often seen in the street. I feel like drugged trying more and more perfumes.... Indian women love perfumes and jewels.... I feel like them now! Oriental perfumes like saris take me at the heart of India! I leave the shop with a lof of little bottles in their red boxes. I will come back to Europe with all India in my rugback! Amazing that I smell the best perfumes in India and also suffered the worse smells in the street......... Contradictions of India!

20 June 2008-----6:48 PM--------------Dinner with the monkeys!
I have a dinner of mangos before going to the 7pm puja at Danaswamedh Ghat. So delicious and refreshing as well as nourishing! I will eat more tomorrow and will ask Gopal for a restaurant. I am eating facing the Ganges and the Nepali Temple. Monkeys are attracted by my mangos. A mummy monkey comes with her babe drinking her breast milk. The baby is lovely and I decide to share my meal. Very lovely to have new friends! A bigger male comes but I have no compassion. Another mother comes and I give some mango.... I might have a colony of monkeys waiting for me now... Animals are real part of Indian life, cows, goats, dogs, monkeys are very present everywhere! Still looking for elephants and snakes but might have to wait to be in South India!

Sarnath park

-------------------------------------------------------Sarnath Monasteries

21 June 2008------Back

21 June 2008-----6:30 AM--------------Puja under the monsoon!
Last night the Puja on Daraswamedh Ghat was very wet. I decided to walk along the Ganges which is very easy from the hotel, situated literally two minutes away. A lovely and meditative walk where you can see all the Ghats and stairs leading to the waters. Kids want to sell you postcards and lotus flower candles which you can put on the Ganges for prayers. I bought two of them and you've all been blessed and protected!

I joined the Indians praying and clapping along the ceremony and sat cross legged. This time I was seeing the ceremony from another perspective not far from the musicians and priests.

You can see the statue of Sivala, Goddess of smallpox. Soon after the start of the puja, rain began to fall.... a woman invited me to stand near the priest under a huge wooden umbrella and I had the chance to see the face and expressions of lovely young musicians, problably brahmins. The rain fell more and more heavily. The Monsoon has definitively arrived. Candles were trembling and the priest continued the ceremony in spite of the heavy rain. Indians began to leave but I was lucky to stay there a bit longer.

It was obvious that Indians wanted me to stay and understood I had come from far away. But a lot of the Indians at these ceremonies come from many parts of their country to visit Varanasi and I did not feel different from them.

For an Indian to see Varanasi in a life time is a great benediction. I now understand why. I am sure it will be difficult to leave this holy city.

21 June 2008-----7:07 AM--------------Gopal's fate
After my morning practice of yoga on the roof, I began to organise my next trip to Bodh Gaya with a man called Randee. Randee works on the top of the hotel near the restaurant. He changed my traveller cheques yesterday and will help get the tickets for me. He can also arrange my tickets for Katmandou, and from Katmandou to Bihar where I will meet Swami Satyananda in Rikhia.

I will go to Bodh Gaya by train but not until a week's time, probably on 29 June, just 2 days prior my retreat. This should give me the time to experience the holy city of Gautama.

My guide and "son", Gopal, just came to greet me with a large happy smile. He has just put on the noos perfume I bought for him yesterday when I visited Rumee. Gopal was delighted and smelled like heaven. I feel pleased because I know he is under huge pressure in his life and cannot sleep. Little things always help in time of great difficulties.

Egit, the owner of the sari shop and Puja hotel, found Gopal when he was only a very young boy just working in the streets of Varanasi. Gopal was only 13 then. Egit employed him in his silk shop and taught him English. Now he is working non-stop in the hotel.

He is a clever guy and understands or thinks that he is 'stuck in this lifetime'. No education. No diploma. How could he escape his fate? He has insufficient experience to make money by starting a small business or opening a shop in old Varanasi. He cannot see any way out of his hard life in the hotel where he does not earn a lot of money. He fears for the fate of his 3 sisters who could be far worse off in life if they are not able to marry (prostitution etc...). Responsible for the whole family, father, mother and 3 sisters, he seems lost, and does not know how he can cope.

His sisters are an especially big source of worry. When an Indian woman has no education and no money, she needs to make a good marriage and needs a dowry otherwise no marriage can be arranged. I encourage Gopal to have faith and keep smiling. It is always weird to hear Indians mentioning 'future life', and this of course comes more often from the mouths of poor people...

There is not a lot I can do other than to encourage Gopal to appreciate life for its best moments and to do what he humanly can to help his family. Obviously I will assist by giving him a good tip, certainly deserved for all the services he gives me with a smile and good spirit.

21 June 2008-----2:54 PM--------------Dinner with Gopal and Friday afternoon at Shiva Shop.
Why is it going so fast? Varanasi just takes me by surprise.... Everybody takes care of me. I am one of the only customers here as we are in the off-season.

Gopal is totally devoted to me and escorts me everywhere. The hotel has adopted me. Life is very good to me. The employees are all very nice. Everything is for the best in the best of all possible worlds! Is Candide speaking in me? I know it is not all for the best everywhere around me, but for the moment I am fine.

Egit's nephew is having a music instruments business and I met him this afternoon in the Shiva Shop where the flautist and tabla player Lolit works. I know all about flute making in India, the Behari flute (simple flutes made of young bamboo which could easily crack in few years: there is also no extra hole at the end of the flute and therefore less resonance), the Assam flutes which demonstrate the importance of aging bamboo, the added hole for resonance and the 2 different types of flutes for men and women. Smaller holes for women's fingers. I just met the man who makes the most beautiful flutes in all India and provides Chaurasia, the greatest Indian flautist, with his flutes.

I tried as many flutes as I could find in the shop.... thousands. Sonu, the Shiva shop owner, is nearly as white as I am though he is Indian. He explained to me that he originates from Pakistan. Only the holy red bindi on his forehead indicates he is Hindi; otherwise, you would think he is Italian.

Here the making of flutes doesn't stop at 11 holes; there can be 24 or even more... CC, sharp CC: (double C is a double-sized flute in C with a very deep sound, very difficult to play but making a fascinating sound). Sonu showed me some very big bamboo flutes with deep sounds and of course I could not play them because the holes were too big. Naturally, he offered to make some for me and my fingers! Next time I come to Varanasi!

Varanasi is like Ali Baba's cave and I need to watch my budget! So many temptations! Many of India's riches are here, obviously the spiritual ones but also the very sensuous ones. Music too is spirituality and that is why all ceremonies use so many instruments on the Ganges Ghats.

Fortunately I will be meditating and practising yoga until the end of August and there will be no time for being 'coquette' or succumbing to the richness and warmth of the best bamboo flutes! I am thinking of beginning a 'bamboo flute business' on Brighton beach with flower necklaces.

On my way back, I went to try the saris on. The boleros are right and will be finished tomorrow. Gopal found me so beautiful - Indian men love women in saris - that he wanted to take photos and I hope I will be able to send them to you if I find the way to crack this computer. Blue turquoise is very flattering and makes me look very happy and young! I now know how to wear the sari and it is the most beautiful woman's fabric I have ever worn. I can't help thinking of Maman and the photo of her at 20 when she was wearing a sari for a theatre show at her college...

As the hotel, the silk and saris shop and the music shop all belong to the same family, I always have an escort of young boys showing me the way through Varanasi's the very narrow alleys.

Tomorrow Sonu, the music business man, will invite me to lunch. He will introduce me to his family, including his daughters. Like Egit, Sonu belongs to the rich class of business men: one of the most important and certainly the richest one. The Brahmin are obviously very important in Varanasi as they are in charge of all the ceremonies on the Ganges Ghats.

Next week I will have lunch with the perfume man. So easy to make friends here. Business is also something very nice in India because you take time. You are given chai (Indian tea), you speak of life and spirituality and an afternoon is gone... and your wallet empty if you are not careful!

I now have to take a quick shower since I am going to an Indian classical concert in the music ashram I visited yesterday. I thought I would have time to rest in India, but here in Varanasi I am busier than ever meeting people, playing flute and practising meditation. But energy is everywhere in the air and you cannot feel any tiredness in the holy city of Varanasi!

22 June 2008------Back

22 June 2008-----5:51 AM-------------- Sitar and Tabla concert in Varanasi.
The Saturday night sitar and tabla concert was lovely. A small contribution was asked on entry. 50 rupees (equivalent of 50 pence): not a lot, but a significant sum for most Indians.

You never know what to expect because music is not always considered as 'a business' as it is in Europe. However, I can see that this situation is changing and that musicians are trying to make a living out of their art.

In the past, no Brahmin would have imagined making money out of music. Musicians practised for the love of art and for their personal and family entertainment. Music was not only confined to the Brahmins.

So the two brothers from the International Music Centre played together. Their rhythm and melodies are complex and subtle. They play the traditionnal ragas which follow very specific forms, and even improvisation is very codified. We listen religiously and cross-legged.

Raga music is best listened to with eyes closed, although it is also captivating to observe the beauty of the instruments and the expressions of the musicians, who were traditionally dressed. Their foreheads were covered with white marks and red bindi, showing their membership of the Brahmin class, which is so powerful in Varanasi.

The concert lasted one hour, during which my mind was drifting along the laces of notes. After the concert, lemon tea was offered.... I was on a cloud!

I met a young French girl and an American girl at this concert and they decided to come back to my hotel and to have diner in the restaurant of the hotel on the top of the roof. Gopal was with me and it was precious to be guided through the labyrinth of alleys.... These two young girls came from New Delhi where they do voluntary work for a charity in a suburban school for orphans. They are free at weekends, and visit India as they are doing now. I was full of admiration for their purity, good heart and early commitment to poor children.

We shared our impressions and feelings on poverty and begging, which can be very daunting here. The fact that Indian people speak English, even the poorest ones also contribute to this state of things. Children in streets even speak French, German and very rapidly learn the basic notions of language. Survival! That's their way to beg and catch you! They told me about their weird experience of Indian massage...

Indian massage is done entirely naked. Perfumed and ayurvedic oils are used according to your needs, as are marma points or acu points, points of energy. These young 20-year-old girls were offered massage in Rishikesh. They were not aware of the way Indian massage is practised and felt rather awkward to have their naked buttocks and the place around their breast touched. Safer to ask for women to massage you!

I would love to know how Indian women agree to being massaged by men who are expert in it! I will refrain from seeking this experience. Tourists can be the prey of many bad experiences. I have not a lot of trust either in every Yoga Centre advertised in Varanasi alleys.... You can see mattresses for yoga facing the street and it would be the last place where I would practise yoga! Recommendations are highly important in matters of yoga. Yoga is not something you can buy in a shop! My morning practice on the roof is indeed much better and powerful!

22 June 2008-----6:19 AM-------------- Helping Pappu and Gopal!
Thinking back on the lovely young girls giving five weeks of their life to young children, I thought that my way of helping some Indian people could be different. It is not always easy to find five weeks to go to India when you are not a student.... I advised Puppa to create a website and to advertise his services as a 'Guide to Agra' to improve his income.

Yesterday Gopal asked me if I could help him to set up a website! I know that he is trapped and I feel for his three sisters. I am determined to learn the basics of website design to help those two men to get clients and improve their status.

My friend Ted from Brighton has offered to teach me how to create a website for my own interests and I will certainly seize this opportunity to help not only myself but these 2 struggling Indian men. I'd rather do that than just giving money. First of all I don't have money, but furthermore much better to teach them to make money by themselves.

22 June 2008-----6:44 AM-------------- Manikarnikat Ghat - burning bodies.
The computer was busy this morning and I decided to go walking on my own before updating the blog. I no longer need Gopal to help me find my way through the alleys.

As soon as I arrived at the Ganges, it poured with rain. Heavy rain. Buckets of water. The monsoon at its fullest. But it did not bother me too much and I kept walking towards Manikarnikat Ghat. An Indian showed me the way although I did not need him. I knew where to go.

Anyway I climbed the stairs and arrived in the old house above the place where the bodies are burned. I knew that this house as well as the one nearby are empty and belong to the government. But the guy told me all kind of stories, of hospice etc which were just huge lies to get money. I got rid of him and he was not pleased but you have to be rather rough sometimes in India.

Apart from this slight incident, a frequent occurrence in India, the view of the Ghat and the burning bodies was very moving. The monsoon accentuated some of the sadness and melancholy one can feel when watching such scenery.

Sandal wood is piled up high. The best wood is used to burn the bodies. A body takes up to three hours to burn. There is an average of 150/200 bodies incinerated each day and night. Burning never stops. This tradition is very very old. Some bodies come from Bombay, Madras, from all over India. A body approaches on a bed, covered with an orange and gold cloth. The body is quickly bathed in the Ganges before being burned. The family is in attendance. Photos are strictly prohibited here.

After some meditation on death, I return to the hotel and prepared myself for my flute lesson!

22 June 2008-----5:24 PM--------------First lunch in an Indian family
I arrived at 11am at Lolit and we discussed music and played some flute. Lolit taught me a simple tune with a lot of thrills. I know I wont learn much from him on the flute but he is more knowledgable in tablas.

He showed me his back room with sitars and a beautiful heart shape harp. I passed through the centre of the house, which is always kept empty (sometimes you have cows there). In the middle of this room was a somptuous white marble flower. You would not find that in modern European buildings! This flower decoration is like the beating heart of the house.

Suno came at 12am and we discussed the caste systems in India. Then He took me for lunch in his family where I had the most beautiful Indian meal.

First I was staying on the bed (very hard). No it was not an invitation! The Mum and Dad of Sonu were present! Indians use beds to sit cross-legged. Mona, Sonu's wife, stayed in the kitchen and served us throughout the diner. I went to see her in her kitchen.

Traditional kitchen. Women prepare the food sitting on their heels which gives them a lot of power in the legs and health. I had fresh vegetable food with salad, kurd (from the sacred cows in the house), curry potatoes, dahl, rice, chappatis. Dessert was mango and rice pudding. I was totally stuffed!

23 June 2008------Back

23 June 2008-----5:59 AM--------------Adventures on the Ganges
Yesterday was so wet and humid.... Little rain all day long. Sometimes buckets of rain. The monsoon is really here. People and cows feel nervous. We're all sticky and need to take up to 4 or 6 showers a day. I am lucky I am not the sweating type, but even so the monsoon easily goes to your head.

After a short nap at the end of the afternoon, I decided to go for the evening puja which is the most beautiful thing in Varanasi. I went on my own as I now know my way and do not need Gopal to guide me. As usual I was sollicited by kids, beggars and false saddhus. I am getting used to it, but it is still tiring.

I hired a boat from which I was able to watch the ceremony. I agreed to pay a woman a fee of 100 rupees. She showed me a small boat with a very young boy who was swimming in the Ganges. He looked very young and I asked how old he was. He said he was 15. Perhaps he was younger, but Indians can be very short.

A cute boy. Beautiful smile and beautiful white teeth. I was slightly concerned that the boy would not be strong enough to go to the Ghat. After a few hundred metres, the young boy was really struggling and we were going backwards. We nearly arrived at the Ghat, but he could not really make it..... The current was getting far too strong for this young boy. I offered to row but he would not let me. We finally had to go back as it was obvious that the boy would not make it and was exhausted.

I felt sorry for him and there was no more puja but just a struggle with the power of the Ganges and this poor kid trying to earn 100 rupees for his family. 100 rupees (roughly 1 pound) is a lot here and can provide food for few days.

Anyway, I did not want to risk falling into the Ganges, getting all my papers wet and catching ‘who knows what’! I asked the boy to let me off on the river bank. I gave him some money and felt really sorry that he had been sent to do this job.

Now I realise how quickly and dramatically the currents on the Ganges can change in direction and strength.

After this little accident, I decided to walk to the main Ghat and almost immediately bumped into Sonu and Gopal so we went there altogether. We opted for a smaller Ghat near to the hotel.

Once a ceremony finishes, everybody is given a kind of semolina, sacred food. This food is placed in your hand. It is almost an offence not to take it, because it is sacred. Your hand is very sticky after eating, but Gods are working big time for you! It is said that once you are in Varanasi all good things contrive to make you happy, as long as you ask Shiva! The happiness is conferred on both you and the people you pray for!

23 June 2008-----6:46 AM--------------A short night and a sticky morning!
The electricity is very hectic in Varanasi and you have power cuts all the time. Electricity is not underground. This is only the case in big cities like Delhi, Calcutta or Bombay.

So the A/C (air conditioning) stopped at around 3pm and I woke up feeling very hot. My stomach too was a bit upset, but not too much. I could not sleep any more and decided to take the opportunity to get up earlier and begin my ashram style life, getting up at 4am.

I looked through the window and the Ganges looked very angry and agitated. The current was so strong that I realised that taking boats would not be possible anymore. Anyway I decided to check and go to the Ganges. I went downstairs (I am on the 4th floor without a lift - good exercise!).

Gopal was just waking up. Poor Gopal. Working like a slave. Going to bed with the last customers coming back to the hotel at 2am and waking up at 5.30 to open the gates. From Brahmin origin, Gopal struggles and will struggle even more since the marriages of his sisters will cost him a lot of money. The highest cast also means highest dowry!

I am surprised that he can take all this unfair pressure on his shoulders, but family is everything for him and also for Indian people in general. This system of dowries and not encouraging women to work is so mad.... Other reasons why these girls will not be able to work are their lack of qualifications and the difficulties in finding jobs in this locality.

Here is a poor young man of 23 who cannot enjoy life and has to sacrifice everything in life in an effort to secure marriages for his 3 sisters. Mind-sets are slow to change and Indian society needs to wake up......

We go together to the Ganges. The Ganges has risen 8 feet up during the night because of the very heavy rain. There is no longer any access to the ghats through the Ganges. Neither could you get there by boat, as as the current is now extremely powerful.

I return to the hotel. There is a big power cut due to the flooding, so there is no chance to use the Internet. Sonu arrives. I am offered chai. We talk about education, marriage and monsoons. Sonu is a happy man, as he is fulfilled both in his marriage and profession. Money definitely helps.

State education is very bad in India and every rich family purchases private education for their children. Computing, English and languages are very important parts of the curriculum.

Sonu’s wife is a traditional housewife taking care of the children and the family. Women live among themselves. Sonu's mother has diabetes. Sonu explains how she was on insuline for 2.5 years and then went for ayurvedic medecine and was able to come off the insuline. She now does 2 hours of yoga every morning.

Sonu explains that in India diabetics never stay long on insuline and are offered other types of treatment. Of course you have to find a very good ayurvedic doctor (India has 200 in all according to Sony) and follow yoga.

23 June 2008-----7:20 AM--------------Freedom in Europe
Just spoke to Gopal. Discussing about possibilities of website and ways for him to make money and to help his sisters to make good marriages. The dowry for each sister is 100,000 rupees (equivalent to £10,000 pounds), which is enormous even by Indian standards. This dowry is important because Gopal is a Brahman.

Gopal's dad did not have a government job and therefore no pension. He used to work in a chemist’s, reading prescriptions. Now his eyes are no longer good so he cannot work and has no income. Gopal has a lot of admiration for ‘western freedom’ and hates the Indian system, but there is no way out. He thinks that everything depends on education and diplomas especially in India.

A girl of 30 is too old for marriage because she has lost the freshness of her looks and beauty. At least Gopal manages to feed all his family. He shows me the photo of his elder sister. A lovely girl in a lovely sari like a doll.

Gopal will introduce me to his family. I told him I was not rich and could not help him financially, but could help him and create a website to become a tourist guide.

I realise how terrible it can be to belong to the higher caste! I understand why people need God here! What other solution could there be to Gopal's problems? I am sure there are millions of Gopals and unfortunate ladies who cannot marry and stay celibate all their life because of the dowry system.

I am trying not to feel ‘too sympathetic’ because I won't be able to travel for the next three months if I harbour everybody's problems... But what can you do when you see all this poverty in street and all this begging?

23 June 2008-----12:34 PM -------------- The caste system
I spent a good part of the morning checking out Indian railways and rates, before booking through the hotel’s travel agency. It is very important to do so because travel agent do not quote you official rates, have no computers and you can easily be ripped off in India. I also have to check some flights from Varanasi to Katmandou where I plan to visit my cousin Carole.

A lovely girl named Charlotte helped me in my research. A real traveller who is a nurse and used to travel in 3rd world countries. Nice to speak to her and wonderful to see real vocations of helping others and knowing other nationalities.

Gopal called me for lunch in Sonu's. Sonu's house is just near the hotel. Beautiful cows lay downstairs, well fed and happy, some have flowers necklaces. The mother welcomed me very warmly. Sonu's mother and wife do not speak English. Sonu's wife, Mona, understands it a little bit and manages to speak to me. Most of our communication is done through smiles and eye contact.

Women are very traditional and totally submissive…. Mona remained in the kitchen cooking while we were eating. The bed is central in the room and has so many functions. We were all sitting cross-legged on it at some point. I offered to help to take the plates back to the kitchen once we finished the meal, but Monare refused.

Guests are sacred in India. Sonu introduced me his 2 daughters. They're already very good in English. 4 and 8 years old. Of course, they speak Sanskrit and Hindi, and in the future they will learn French and German. The father came dressed all in white with a long beard and the red bindi on his forehead and around his neck. He greeted me with the traditional prayer ‘hands salute’. He ate on his own. He is leading a Sadhu's life and devotes himself to prayers and does not share his bed any more with his wife.

Coming back from Sonu's, I had to resolve some issues with my mobile phone. The New Delhi agency has not submitted my application form and I could have my calls stopped.... Ah India!

Gopal is really useful and I have no doubt he could make a very good living as a guide and taxi-driver for rich foreigners. He is a very handsome man. A short moustache and dressed like a Westerner - blue jeans and turquoise blue shirt.

Another visit to the silk industry, the saris are nearly ready.... The sales manager wants to show me more panjabis and scarves and I have to be firm to avoid any more purchases!

Ramee has a little thread around the ankle and I ask why. It's a holy thread to "cure" ulcers! He explains that doctors are too expensive (5500 rupees) and he prefers to use prayers. He has never seen a doctor in his life!

That is the way in Varanasi! You pray for everything! Egit arrives and loves me so much in blue that he wants to cut another Indian suit for me, but I resist!

I leave the silk shop and go to Lolit's to finish learning this famous bollywood tune on my flute. A sweet and romantic tune. Lolit promises a book with tunes and lyrics. Afterwards I went back to the hotel, had to wait for the computer and had a long discussion about astrology and caste systems....

Such an old world full of superstitions and incredible tantric practices! Ganesh everywhere, Krishna, Parvati, Shiva.... According to Sonu the caste system will disappear in the next generation. It is very powerful in Varanasi because Varanasi is an old and traditional city.

Seeing Gopal's misery, I only hope that this nonsense will stop and women liberate themselves, but will Varanasi keep its soul and beautiful prayers on the Ghats? Other towns like Delhi and Calcutta do not care about castes, and love marriages happen more and more, dowries disappearing.... Sonu wants his daughters to be free, not to be kept at home, but to study and follow professions. India is definitively moving …slowly but surely. I feel very happy to have so many invitations and to be taken into people’s confidence. This really gives me the opportunity to understand people and their traditions.

23 June 2008-----5:10 PM -------------- Paranoia
Third shower of the day. You get sweaty very quickly with monsoon humidity. My stomach was slightly upset and I took some medication to clear it up fast, as I do not only trust Shiva and Gange’s power but also that of Western medicine!

I think my mobile has been blocked because the Reliance agent did not sent my application form. Very annoying. I am going to sort this problem out tomorrow morning. It can easily happen with India. I am now checking everything on computer, train and flight fares etc because you cannot trust all the information you get here, and travel agents who do not work with computers just quote the prices they want. I might even print some tickets on the hotel computer.

When I told a young traveller, a nurse called Charlotte, that I had lunch in an Indian family, she immediately said that I should never take my passport and money when going to Indians' home as they could drug you and rob you!!! Of course it did not happen because I have known Sonu for one week and he is owner of the hotel. But this remark from a New Zealand girl shows the prevailing paranoia. Not a pleasant feeling. I hate it, but it is true that you have to be very vigilant all the time and it can spoil the travel. Even the Indian people I have befriended (Pappu, Gopal, Sonu) warn me.

Fortunately I have managed to establish good rapport with some people and that is what matters. Of course Gopal is waiting for a good tip. I am no fool, but he is nice and will deserve his tip for all the good services he gives me. Lolit is a nice man but has not got a lot to teach me except on snake charming and one nice tune. I won’t waste more time. You have to be very selective....

You cannot imagine how dirty India can be and how clean too in some houses. There is a feeling of the Middle Ages in the very old city of Varanasi. Houses are not only old but in a very bad state or repair. Houses have not been painted for ages. Garbage is not taken away on a regular basis. This explains some very bad smells. There is cow shit everywhere but.......... it is still magic and unique. I really love the cows here. They're cool and sweet! You can trust them and they don't beg! I wish I could give them grass!

Sometimes I think that if I were Gopal (but can I put myself in his shoes?) I would take my 3 sisters and emigrate and leave it all... Not that easy to break with your roots, I suppose, even if you dislike the system.

Another ceremony tonight. The Ghat is now very restricted as the Ganges is so high. There is the worship of the 5 elements fire, water, earth, air and ether, with many symbols: candles, petal throwing, shell playing, mudras and gestures. The rituals are very codified and comes from very ancient times: the vedic and tantric eras (5000 years ago). Mantras too. You can find some of the symbols in Tibetan Tantric Buddhism. Same roots. The musicians are fabulous and the voices are thrilling. Sometimes my rational Western mind forgets all and just follows the beauty of images and sounds....

24 June 2008------Back

24 June 2008-----04:27 AM --------------Keeping an open heart
Hello
A good night sleep and a morning yoga practice in front of the Ganges makes me see India in a better perspective. My friend Ted sent me some extracts from a book called Karma Cola, Marketing the Mystic East. It is a very negative view of India and obviously some ignorant Westerners can be the prey of false gurus. However, if you know about spirituality and your practice of yoga has been genuine, nobody can fool you, neither here nor in Europe where the danger can be just as big! I would not try any of the yoga shops in old Varanasi, and I don't give much for the music shops either. You need good recommendations, and in that respect, it is no different than finding a good teacher in Europe.

I am aware of con men and people wanting to make profit from Westerners. India is so poor and it is not surprising that bad seeds grow up everywhere. I still keep an eye open for the beauty of India, the fabulous Ganges, the nice people here, and soon the ashrams of Bihar.

I know some people have a very cynical attitude towards India but I do not feel it is the right way to come and visit India. It is obvious that you have to be careful because of poverty, but too much caution could just end up making the trip sour and close your eyes to what is beautiful, not only in towns and landscapes but also in people.

What I have seen in Sonu's family was love and respect. In Pappu too. Sometimes you have to go with your intuition and it is very useful to have plenty of it when you travel so your heart cannot be fooled.

24 June 2008-----09:37 AM -------------- Betel
Tried my first betel leave and felt the taste of India in my mouth. Betel is a green leaf inside which Indians put some spices. 5 rupees. You chew it and spit it afterwards and it smells strong and fresh. It leaves your mouth very red and makes you feel high. I was not very sure about the spitting and don't feel like renewing the experience. Many Indians here chew betel with tobacco.... Mouths and teeth are not always in the best state in India and I am afraid that most Indians have no access to medicine and dentistry. Their food can be also very spicy, salty and sweet, which is not a great diet, but my diet in the ashram will be much purer and will contain no spices.

24 June 2008-----09:48 AM --------------Buckets of water and showers
The system of toilets and showers is very different from western countries. No toilet paper. Turkish-style toilets, which is good for squatting and stomach muscles. There is always some water to clean yourself afterwards. More efficient than the Western way.

Showers most of the time consist of a bucket of water. I've already had two cold showers today and each is a benediction because the monsoon makes you feel sticky and heavy. The Ganges has never been so high this June. Climate change. I am probably lucky to have avoided the hot season and to have had an early monsoon.

Indians tend to take several showers a day and are very clean, but this is not always the case with poor people who cannot even clean their clothes. I went near the Ganges early this morning. An Hindu was cleaning his orange dapatha (scarf) in the Ganges waters which were very brown. Sacred waters but I wonder if it really have magic cleaning powers... A little girl was having shampoo and taking bath which would probably have killed me.

24 June 2008-----09:55 AM -------------- Liberation of women and the pink sari movement
The more I hear Gopal worrying about his impossible situation and his Varanasi trap, the more I feel I want to wake up women and encourage them to seek emancipation and liberation. It would not be a good idea for me to stay too long in India - othewise, I could get into real troubles with traditional Hindu society. I am very curious to go and see Gopal's sisters and wonder why women do not think for themselves and rebel. I know there is the new pink sari movement trying to say "no" to dowries. By the way, I have a pink sari, so I could join the movement and encourage Indian women to work and be independent!

24 June 2008-----10:04 AM -------------- Contact with my cousin Carole
Carole will be waiting for me in Nepal from 11 to 20 July after my Vipassana Buddhist meditation retreat. She just confirmed. I will meet her new husband, Sagun, and will stay near the house of her new parents-in-law. Exciting. From Bodhgaya I should go back by train to Varanasi and take a flight.

Rail map-----Back

Link to the Official website of the Ministry of Railways, INDIA

Have to look at my map of India and decide if buses or an airplane is better.

Road Map-----Back

I have been told that buses are very hectic and roads not always very good. Another thing to check on computer!

Link to the Domestic flights, INDIA

Domestic airports-----Back

25 June 2008------Back

25 June 2008-----4:33 AM--------------Cheeky monkeys can be dangerous!
After I checked that my mobile was ok at the Reliance agency, I had lunch on the hotel roof where the view on the Ganges is so great. A French young girl and her boyfriend, whom I met some days ago at the concert, were also eating on the roof. The French girl told me that a monkey bit her ankle two days ago and she had to go to the hospital and get new jabs done although she has done all her vaccinations before leaving for India. Annoying and she will have to do several other jabs at weekly intervals. She only took a photo of the monkey (a maquaque) who obviously did not like it. Monkeys can be aggressive and you have to be sensible. It is also better not to eat in their vicinity as they would just come and steal your food! A bit like the seagulls in Brighton who would take your ice cream on the pier....

While I was practising yoga on the roof yesterday , a monkey was behaving very strangely by banging on a table for no apparent reason. Monkeys can be angry for many reasons: heat, the monsoon, hunger.... Who knows?!

The divine white monkey and son of the Supreme God, Hanoman is a heroic fighter and a very wise advisor to Rama but I will be very cautious and won't try to take pictures of these divine creatures! Cows are cooler! I love their large loving eyes and their divine tranquillity! Here in old Varanasi every (rich) Hindu has got several cows kept in the court of the house like we have dogs! They take them out at sunset...

25 June 2008-----5:04 AM --------------Ayurvedic massage!
My first ayurvedic massage experience with the gentle but strong Sonu! Sonu is 40 years old, married and father of two lovely girls. He belongs to the rich silk saris family. Some years ago, he started a successful music business, selling Indian instruments (mainly tablas, sitars and harmoniums) to both India and Europe. Although Sonu is not a professional masseur, he has learned the art of massage with a guru and knows about herbs, which come from the jungle (at 100 km from Varanasi), and the difference ways to approach bodies, male as well as female.

Sonu is a strong man (he did weight lifting in the past) and makes me think of the God Elephant Ganesh. He would be very flattered with the comparison as Ganesh is the God of strength and opulence. Ganesh is all houses here and every morning a boy comes to the guest house to bring little garlands of flowers which decorate all the Gods of the hotel including the triumphant Ganesh at the reception.

Sonu recites a very short prayer before the massage. The massage is done on the bed of my hotel room. Purity is very important as you're entirely naked when you're given an Indian massage but I know I can trust Sonu and my trust was not disappointed.

My back is first massaged, several times. My body absorbs the powerful oils. Sonu is happy because my body responds very well to oils. He has mixed the herbs in pure oil for 24 hours before filtering it. The smell is wonderful. The hands glide from the back to the feet. It is a strong massage. Sonu notices a lot of "pain" in the back. My body certainly had some tensions and the carrying of a heavy backpack does not help. Massage should be done once a month minimum. When was my last massage? One year ago perhaps...

The front of the body is equally massaged for 20 minutes. This is the ideal time for a "yoga" body and it should not be too long as the massage is very powerful. The breast is vigorously massaged but it is still relaxing. After it is finished, I put on a coloured penjabi because the oils could darken my clothes and Sonu finishes by head massage with a coconut oil with other plants. My hair is also massaged with the perfumed oil. The smells are very intoxicating. It is all finished and I can rest.

Sonu refuses any remuneration as he only gives massage to friends. He advises me to rest. I rest and felt straight asleep from 6pm until early this morning. Yes a very powerful massage indeed. I followed Sonu's instructions and kept all the oils and did not wash body and hair until this morning. Now I feel very well and my cold has nearly disappeared.

The power of this massage is certainly connected to the oils and the full naked body massage. Nothing like shiatsu and its acupressure points.... Ayurvedic massage is powerful and also uses marma points (traditional acu points). Sonu enjoys giving and has a natural generous nature. He certainly possesses what is called a healing power. His hands are the warmest I ever ever experienced and I coud literally feel the energy flowing from his hands to my body!

Kerala in India is also very famous for massages and I hope I will also try there the art of Indian massage. Indian massage is a very intimate business and implies complete trust. I am afraid that a lot of travellers are unaware of this reality and just try with the first person they meet as they would take a yoga lesson in the first shop... Sonu has explained to me that the gender of the masseur and client did not matter but only the purity of the person giving massage.

25 June 2008-----6:50 PM --------------Long legged insects become my friends!
I spent the early morning gently chasing all kinds of insects from my room. I fully respect the principles of non-violence and non-killing and take a lot of time speaking to these insects even the ones who look so scary and hideous to my western eyes. I guide them to the balcony with the help of my golden sandals. Not always easy when a very hairy or long legged one falls on my nose when I am sleeping... A good way to develop a compassionate mind and a love of nature and animals, even the insects!

Mosquitos have been devouring me for the last 3 days exactly since the monsoon began. Sonu thinks that those female mosquitos love my sweet blood. I decided to look for the material I bought when I prepared my journey and I am now using peaceful actions to repel the 'bloody' insects. Natural oil with lemongrass every 4 hours on legs, arms and neck. Perfume diffuser in my room. I close the windows at 6pm and tonight I will try my mosquito net for the first time. No risk of malaria here. Only itchy bites.

Usually nights are very very hot in spite of the A/C because nothing is working properly, and with the monsoon the power cuts are worse than ever. Also there is no connection with my "reliance" mobile. Even my guide Gopal could not contact me today when he needed to. That's India! But I am safe and the internet connection is still working fine.

25 June 2008-----7:12 PM --------------A visit to Ali Baba's cave!
I was invited at noon for a lunch in the saris shop! Vokil, the sale manager, had the saris ready for me (sari, blouse cut in a part of the sari and petticoat). Very beautiful indeed and I wish I could send you photos but alas the computer is not powerful enough to send photos. I just need a party here or in Nepal to have the chance to put on my pink and blue sari. I get proficient at wearing them and it is very easy and natural once you've learned. Saris have been worn by Indian ladies for thousand of years.

Vokil tells me that on some drawings of Krishna, you can already see them. Thousands and thousands of years.... 5000 years old! Not surprising that Indian women still wear them as it is the most elegant way to dress. I understand why Catherine Deneuve wanted some for her parties! Floating around the body like a glove, the sari is the perfect cloth for women.

A lot of women wear the penjabi (long tunique, floating trousers and scarf or dapatha). More practical and indicative of the heat. The last thing I would like to wear here is jeans, but funnily enough it is what Gopal wears all the time. It suits him but he sweats a lot! Men are usually dressed in a Western manner, except some of those in the shop. Men are the active element of Indian society; perhaps they find suits more adaptable or maybe they just want to adopt the Western style.

Vokil did show me again the somptuous pashmina and wild silk scarves of the best quality and amazing warm colour. I chose some for my friends and family because they are beautiful and come from such a special town.

Vokil wanted of course to sell more, but instead gave me a blue silk penjabi with purple embroideries when I told him I was now saving my money for travel and to pay my yoga training. Indians always have unexpected ways of doing business!

25 June 2008-----7:20 PM--------------Indian meal and philosophy!
Between showing me the scarves (they absolutely show you ALL the scarves and don't care about having to fold them again!), Vokil and I discussed philosophy and the famous Shankacharya born in Varanasi... and dead aged 23, leaving behind him a lot of sacred texts. Vokil explains the difficulty in becoming a sadhu (holy wandering renunciant man) not just that of leaving everything behind, money, possesions, family but also the problem of getting agreement from your mother. You mother is more important than God because she gave birth to you (Vokil's words). Shankacharya's mum, like a lot of mothers who don't want to lose their sons, refused permission for him to become a sadhu when he asked as a very young boy.

So he decided to trick her. Shankacharya pretended to drown in the Ganges in front of her Mum and said that he would only make an effort to survive if she authorized him to become a sadhu. He could swim but it was his way to obtain his mum's agreement and she only accepted to the condition he came to her cremation when she died.

A sadhu normally never never comes back to his family once he leaves and wanders on the roads living from charity and begging. Vokil showed me the pictures of the Saints Ramakrishna and Vivekananda.

Holy pictures are everywhere and in the silk house you even have a temple with a shiva lingam in the centre of the house just near the cows.... I asked about reincarnation and for Hindus there is no doubt whatsoever. Reincarnation exists! Otherwise how could you explain the existence of saints like Shankacharya or Ramakrishna who knew so much at such a young age? I listen and do not comment. My disbelief would just pain them without having any benefit. Vokil told me about the "false sadhus", the men who want to escape life's responsibilities (they're quite a lot around, which is not surprising when you consider how hard life is in India) and the "real ones", who have a true vocation. It is sometimes strange to hear all these convictions when you are a rational westerner but Indians have their ways of explaining inequality and/or justifying it. My understanding is certainly more social and genetic....

I told them that I was ignorant of all these realities. Vokil and Agit told me that nobody would come to Varanasi and to their shop without some very special and ancient connection with Varanasi! I told them how I decided to travel to India and how I was guided by different dreams indicating that I should visit Bihar. They loved my dreams!

Vokil told me about Brahma, Rama, Shiva, Vishnu, Krishna, Ganesh, Parvati, Saraswati etc........... they are millions of Gods and everybody can chose what suits him or her! He compares the Gods to the scarves he is showing me.... Many Gods but only one! An unbelievable mixture of polytheism and monotheism.

God is everywhere here in Varanasi and tomorrow is Thursday the day of pujas! I will go to the Golden Temple and will go to the ghats and throw some more lotus candle flowers for all of you!

After my philosophical purchase of scarves, lunch was served. Of course we all dined cross legged in the shop. Vegeterian food with vegetables, curd, rice, chappatis and salade of tomatoes, cucumber and oignons. A bottle of mineral water is always brought for me as they know that westerners cannot drink tap water.

Between the silk shop, the Shiva music shop and the Puja Guest House, I really feel like I am part of a family and they have all adopted me. I am certainly a customer but I also receive genuine care and attention on top of Indian philosophy lessons!

25 June 2008-----8:13 PM--------------My flutes have arrived!
Sonu tells me that the flutes have arrived and I can try them. They are just amazing. Bamboos of 5 or 8 years old. All shapes and widths. The real professional Indian flutes! The longest and largest are far too big for my fingers. Sonu will order some of my size, one octave higher. 14 flutes in all keys including E sharp and B sharp which are quite different from F and C in the Indian understanding of sounds and feelings.

Sonu will give me his mobile number and I can contact him during all my trip if anything happens to me and he will come! I have my body guards in India! Flute is a magic instrument and people just adore you when you play the Krishna flute! I might be naive but I don't think I am wrong concerning Sonu! He certainly is happy to sell his flute but he likes me as well. They are truly lovely people here as well as people far less nice! I am also looking forward to meeting Indians in my visit to the ashrams. There will be no business interest and the exchange will be done in the simplest way.

26 June 2008------Back

26 June 2008-----5:27 AM--------------Of mice and men!

The flute charming flutes are hanging from the walls. A rough painture of Saraswati, the Indian Goddess of Art playing sitar on a flying swan, reminds you of the sanctity of the place and music.

No luxury in this shop, It is rather rough and the paints are old as well as the cushions but I know that in the backroom are the most beautiful and expensive sitars of all India! A kid from the next house is always here with a wonderful smile.... Lolit, the shopkeeper, spends a lot of his time on the step, chewing betel and .... doing nothing! As a Westerner, I am so used of being "productive" that this attitude is really amazing! I understand the afternoon siesta but Indian work is often slow and nothing like in Europe.

We all sit cross-legged in the musical shop. I see a little animal running between the tablas and instruments behind me. It is a mouse, a lovely mouse. I notice the mouse, and Sonu explains that mice cannot be killed and are given food everyday in a corner of the shop: rice and milk! In this way, they do not eat the goatskins of the tablas, which they would otherwise love. Sonu explains that all animals are protected in India. He explains with a very concerned expression that mice sometimes have a disastrous effect on his sales to Westerners, but there is nothing he can do. Mice cannot be killed and must be fed. He tells me too that if his actions are righteous and if he feeds the mice, no instruments would ever be damaged by the happy mice. Mice are pets in India!

26 June 2008-----5:28 AM --------------Snake charming!

One of the representations of Lord Shiva is a cobra. The cobra is a very sacred animal. Of course Indians also kill cobras... especially in the countryside where cobras kill more often.

King Cobra Venomous Snakes Poisonous Image

If you do not disturb a cobra, it won't bite you. Only if you chase it, could it attack you. Cobras especially love women's bodies because they are soft and nice and erotic... Of course many Indians die every year from cobra bites, but mainly in rural areas where you can find snakes - not in towns. It is easy to step on one inadvertently or to move in your sleep disturbing a caressing cobra!

Flute charmers are employed in villages where the danger is greatest. The vibrations of the flute attract the snake (cobras only feel and cannot hear). They get hypnotised by a certain type of flute, made out of a large vegetable and sounding very loud like a Scottish hornpipe. The skilful charmer will then quickly remove the cobra's teeth making it harmless without killing it. You need to be sure of your hand and have prompt reactions!

26 June 2008-----6:27 AM--------------Les malheurs de Sophie!

These false guides are a real burden and I hate them too. No different from people trying to sell you all kind of things over the phone in England! On top of the street hassle, she has a phobia of bugs, cockroaches and insects, which is bad luck in India!

The funny thing is that the Puja hotel personnel warn you against such people, but at the same time, Agit, the hotel and silk shop owner, gives commissions to these guys if they bring tourists to his shop! These "guides" are the only publicity they know for their shops and Indians don't really respect tourists' privacy! I can understand how Sophie became paranoid because I have slightly felt the same since travelling from Agra to Varanasi. It will be nice now to meditate, meet Carole in Nepal and practise yoga far from all these Indians wanting to sell you all the silk of India! But I have also learned to be quite "rude" and efficient with my eyes when needed.

26 June 2008-----7:01 PM--------------Indian Mobile
My Indian mobile has been blocked and I had to go once again to Varanasi Reliance Agency to sort out the situation. The New Delhi agent hasn't done properly his job and my card has been simply blocked.

Simply because I did not have an official Indian address but I was not asked for it!

I have now a new sim card which should be activated tomorrow and hopefully I should be able to send sms to Europe and call India to do my hotel bookings. I went to the agency with Gopal on a big motorbike. Quite an experience, which I will never never renew! First Gopal appeared with his huge roaring bike and told me we would be going quicker. I had to trust my good star and all the Gods of Varanasi. Happily Gopal is a good and safe driver but it is simply horrible to see people, bicycles, cows, goats, cars, rickshaws bicycles and rickshaws appear from everywhere, on your right, on your left, from the sky and I don't know where.... The noise is awful and drivers' horns non-stop in the most ridiculous and barbarian way. The roundabouts are incredible and highly dangerous places. It is a matter of chance and good horns!

No calm in Indian cities. There is no way I could live in an Indian city. My friend Ted will be happy to hear that! The old cities are just after tourists like parasites and the new cities are just unbearably noisy and polluted. Harsh life. But let us keep positive: my mobile should be sorted out and the manager was very cute and very helpful. I am craving for the next coming weeks of my trip, which will be devoted to meditation and yoga. It should be an entirely different experience!

26 June 2008-----7:27 PM --------------Visit to the Golden Temple
Between a visit to the Shiva shop and a last puja on the main Ghat, I decide to visit the famous Golden Temple of Varanasi, entry to which is normally strictly forbidden to non-Hindus. Sonu introduces me to a Brahmin guide of the temple and here I am. A policewoman checks up on me. I have been careful to come only with my passport and have left my bag in the shop. No cameras and no mobiles are allowed. Many police officers guard against possible terrorist actions. Another famous mosque, also forbidden to non-Muslims, is located nearby. The two religions hate each other and some confrontations have happened in the past. It is a bit frightening to see that the "House of God" is surrounded by an army of police. I visit some little temples with mainly shivalinguam, the very ancient symbol of phallus and matrix which are covered with flowers. Shivalinguams are absolutely everywhere. The ultimate symbol of life expressed by the energy of sexuality. Totally tantric and shamanic. All Hindus dream to go to the Golden Temple. All the little temples surrounding the Golden one are devoted to Shiva. Garlands of flowers decorate all the representations of Gods. Of course, some 'priests' ask me to give donations. I just go my way. The guide shows me the exterior of the Golden temple. 300 AC. Nothing really elegant. Just like a dome with gold on top. I asked to go inside and to the surprise of my guide, I "passed" the test and am warmly welcomed in the temple. The question was "Do you believe in Lord Shiva". My straight answer was "I believe in God" which was probably the magic answer. Fortunately I did not have to develop my conception of "God" because it would not have fitted with any Indian belief. So I buy my flowers, a little pot of milk mixed with Ganges water and we entered the temple, having left our shoes on the steps. I am the only Westerner. Very small temples with Shiva representations and more shivalinguams and flowers. I give my flowers and cover the shivalinguam with milk and of course give a small donation. In another temple, I give my name, the name of my mum and dad and must repeat different mantras before being sacred. My forehead is covered with a red spot, the hindu tikka. I am given a coin for happiness and a small red and yellow thread to put around my wrist. No time to meditate. It is a very simple ritual. There are longer rituals which last half an hour with more mantras... I am in contact with the most tantric ancient devotional aspect of Indian religion. I cannot feel any peace, and just feel more worship than real spirituality. A step in a very very old world of devotion and rituals.

26 June 2008-----7:41 PM--------------Gopal's family
I visit Gopal's family. They live in a very poor flat, which is even dangerous. A very simple room. Just a bed and a carpet. Some religious pictures on the wall and a lot of incense boxes. Gopal introduces me to his sisters and parents. A very decent family who keep smiling in spite of the profund unhappiness and financial misfortune. The Dad asks me about Carla Bruni and knows about Sarkozy. A very knowledgeable Brahmin! The mother does not speak English but is obviously proud of her son, the bread-winner. One of the younger sister asks me if I am married. I give her my age and tell her that I am not married, work and am happy without trying to offend. Chai is served with some cakes. I am moved by this welcome knowing their situation.

Gopal explains that the flat belongs to Agit. The condition for this rent was that Gopal lives in the hotel where he has worked 24 hours a day for the last 5 years. Slavery or help? Gopal looks so tense and knows he is trapped. The dad shows a photo. A possible fiancé for the eldest sister. A beautiful Indian man. A recommendation. The family could meet only if Gopal can find the money. Gopal's sisters are all pretty and lovely. They are very traditional Indian girls and never get out of the house. They clean, cook and sew. A world of slavery for both men and women because Gopal is as much trapped as her sisters.

Nobody is strong enough to rebel and Gopal tells me it would take some more generations. We leave for the puja on the ghat. The stairs are dangerous. No light.

26 June 2008-----7:58 PM--------------Last puja on the Ghat
I arrive for the end of the Puja. It is the fourth time I've attended this ceremony. I observe the participants. I am struck by the extreme ritualistic aspect of the puja. Symbol after symbol. Colours and music. The magic of my first evening on the boat has left. I am certainly more critical and can see a lot of superstition with very little spiritual insight. A lot of Indians come from all India to see this puja.

The kirtan (devotional singing) accompanied by the harmonium is very beautiful and I decide not to be over-analytical. Just before the end of the ceremony, I come down the balcony from which I was observing the ritual and go near the Ganges to buy a lotus candle. I light it and gently put it on the water thinking of my sister Veronique, the exams of my niece Shai, all my family and friends. The woman asks me for 100 rupees whereas it costs 10 rupees. I give her 10 rupees and feel very annoyed with all this "false" spirituality and this use of Westerners.

It is time for me to leave Varanasi where I feel tired with the silk shops trying to sell you more and more silk. I am really happy to go to Bodhgaya and have a 10-day retreat after my first two intense weeks in India.

The rituals and the devotional aspect of God are certainly not for me. It is very interesting to see that this ancient mentality and all these superstitions still exist in Varanasi.

27 June 2008------Back

27 June 2008-----5:46 AM--------------Last day in Varanasi
Very little sleep. No A/C. Too hot. Read the Bhagavat Gita and Gandhi. No use to take A/C rooms. It never works and there are power cuts all the time, night and day. I have been told that Bihar is no better and I will go for simple non A/C rooms. Anyway I don't think that my meditation retreat and my yoga training in the Bihar School of Yoga will allow just facilities.

The Monsoon is hard to handle. I feel sticky all the time. Even Indians find it difficult to bear at the moment. You take a shower and you sweat 5 mn later. I would like to live in waters, like buffalos do to refresh their bodies, but certainly not in the Ganges waters....

I relax and try to accommodate to this unusual heat. I have already prepared my bag and have to call for hotels from the reception, as my new mobile number is still not activated. When you are used to the productivity of Western life-styles, it is a bit frustrating that everything works so slowly. I will go for a short walk and take a few photos before leaving the town. I might have to leave my sleeping bag behind, which isn't useful considering the monsoon, and will give it to Gopal's sisters. Everything else in my bag is pretty useful. The mechanical lamp and the Swiss knife prove to be very useful.

The Hotel personnel are speaking as I write this, and the television is on too. The light is weak and the hotel is on standby electricity supply. Hindi is quite a guttural language - very different from the melodious Bengali.

27 June 2008-----8:32 AM--------------Goodbye Varanasi!
After a difficult and sweaty night, I am still hot, but am enjoying Varanasi again and feeling a bit less oppressed by rituals and people hassling me. Went to say goodbye to the silk shop and to Agit, who offered another chai. Lovely atmosphere and welcome. Agit is a good businessman who knows how to deal with people.

Everybody seems unconfortable with the humidity and the heat. I am told that it will be worse in South India but better in Nepal.... I hope that yoga will help me to cope with the extremes of Indian climate. There are some cooling breathing exercises in yoga, but the safest thing is to avoid being in direct sun at midday.

Gopal has been very useful and adorable. He is so happy I have given him my sleeping bag and a pair of my sunglasses. My mobile is still not working though we called the Reliance manager two hours ago.

India is so slow. I wanted to call England but there is no connection.... Varanasi believes in all the Gods, but has pretty bad telecommunications connections. At least the Internet is still working today!

I managed to book a hotel room in Gaya for tonight (Friday 27 June). Hotel Akash.125/200 Rs per night. Laxman Sahay Rd. Gaya. 0091 631 2222205

I will stay in Bodhgaya in the Bhuthanese Monastery from Saturday 28 June to Monday morning 1st July. Buddha Rd. Bodhgaya. 0091 631 2200710 (room 150/250 Rs per night)

My English credit card is not working and I feel a bit worried but I still have some travellers' cheques. It was impossible to call England and check with my bank why the card was blocked. I will try again in Gaya. Should I pray to Ganesh with more intensity? Perhaps my faith is not strong enough...

Everything is slow and takes time in India. Dogs are sleeping in the streets, cows are sleeping in the streets, bulls are sleeping and peaceful and people too.... BUT I am still very active perhaps thanks to my yoga practice and my recent ayurvedic massage. On the way back from the Shiva shop where I left my flutes for packaging to England next September, I bought a mini shivalinguam, a little bucket of brass, which traditionally pours milk and Ganges water on the shiva, a tiny statuette of Ganesh and a little picture of Shiva, his wife and many other gods.... Gopal was very moved to see me buying these few symbols and I tell him I want to remember Varanasi and their tantric rites. Gopal is convinced that if I pray everyday to Shiva and Ganesh, only good things will happen to me, He prays everyday but his situation is still pretty fixed. At least his faith helps him to have courage and to smile. Wishful thinking, superstition, supranatural powers? I will keep the magic and the poetry of Varanasi in my heart and will also think of practical matters when I come back to England!

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