EALING SOUTHALL
Thursday 19th July 2007
RESULT:

Virendra Sharma (Labour)         15188 (41.5%)
Nigel Bakhai (Liberal Democrats) 10118 (27.6%)
Tony Lit (Conservative)           8230 (22.5%)
Sarah Edwards (Green)             1135  (3.1%)
Salvinder Singh Dhillon (Respect)  588  (1.6%)
Dr K. T. Rajan (UKIP)              285  (0.8%)
Yaqub Masih (Christian Party)      280  (0.8%)
Jasdev Singh Rai (Independent)     275  (0.8%)
John Cartwright (OMRLP)            188  (0.5%)
Sati Chaggar (English Democrats)   152  (0.4%)
Gulbash Singh (Ind Con)             92  (0.3%)
Kuldeep Singh Grewal (Ind Lab)      87  (0.2%)
electorate 85262 : turnout 36618 (43%)

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Campaign blog

20th July Thousands of joyous citizens have been dancing and singing in the streets all night long to celebrate the joyous news that I came a very high 9th out of 12 candidates in the Ealing Southall by-election, with an enormous total of 188 votes. Never before have I managed to beat three other candidates at the same time. This is a substantial increase on my result in Bromley & Chislehurst, and a small but significant blow against the crumbling imperialist monopoly of the Lib-Lab-Con-trick parties. This is a message from the Somali, Sikh, Asian, white, Christian and atheist communities of Ealing and Southall that we remember the inmates of Guantanamo Bay; we feel the pain of the people of Somalia under the boot of the invading Ethiopian forces; we respect the path of self-defence and independence followed by the people of North Korea; we continue to be outraged at the incarceration of people under house arrest, and we demand the right to demand change outside Parliament.

16th July An election meeting organised by local trade unions with the UKIP, Green and Respect candidates in attendance punctuated an otherwise not-very eventful hour or two in Ealing Common. Apart from two houses with Lib Dem posters in their windows, there was no sign of any campaigning or activism at all. Two locals told me that I was the first candidate or politician that they had seen in the whole campaign. This is in stark contract to the intense and energetic campaigning by dozens of activists from several parties in Southall. This is a constituency of two very different halves, separated by politics and culture as well as geography. The main parties may be taking the voters of central, south and eastern Ealing for granted, and the result on Thursday may be a reflection of that fact.

15th July The Liberal Democrats seem to have gone back into hibernation, but there was plenty of noise from campaign cars being driven around Southall by the Conservative and Labour parties. A few posters for Yaqub Masih (Christian Party) have appeared in shop windows, and George Galloway commented on my spectacularly brilliant anti-imperialist slogans.

14th July Today in the eastern half of the constituency: nothing. Today in Southall: A Lib Dem car, two Respect cars, two Labour cars, two Respect stalls, one Green Party stall, a Conservative Party stall (with Theresa May MP in attendance), a van full of campaign materials for Jasdev S. Rai (Independent), a gaggle of Labour Party placardists (accompanied by Keith Vaz MP), and the usual growing plethora of young intrepid sandal-wearing yoghurt-knitters with orange placards and Vince Cable MP for the Liberal Democrats. More Lib Dem and Labour posters have appeared in homes, but there is no sign of a third-party squeeze, or a landslide bandwagan, developing for any of the three main parties.

13th July Today I was interviewed by an American work experience journalist from the New Statesman outside Ealing Town Hall, only to be interrupted by Charles Kennedy, Lord Rennard and a gaggle of Lib Dem activists displaying large yellow placards in their traditional psephological mating-ritual with the cameras. This was followed by more placarding, this time through Ealing Common and Northfields, as well as more in Southall Green. There were a few Lib Dem posters in residential houses, balanced by Conservative supporters in the streets, several posters in Southall for the independent candidate Jasdev S. Rai, alongside the usual Labour and Respect posters. The afternoon was rounded off by a delicious sampling of chicken salad and chapatis in a Somali cafe.

11th July Another busy day of campaigning took me to the furthest reaches of Ealing Broadway, Southall, the Grand Union Canal (or at least the bridge over it at the Ealing /Hillingdon border), Ruislip Road in the north and Norwood in the south. In Southall Green ward it was again noticeable that my anti-imperialist policies, particularly in relation to Somalia and Iraq, struck a very meaningful chord among the local population, and I was given a pledge of 100 votes from one young man on behalf of his family and friends. It comes as a reminder of the reality of the great population movements of millions of people which have been caused by wars, genocide, and famines, and that it can be exacerbated by the interference of American military power (and of its puppets in the Ethiopian government which invaded Somalia last year). Such difficulties will only cease when the economy and society of all countries in the world are organised on the basis of fairness and co-operation rather than on exploitation and oppression. Meanwhile, I saw various small gaggles of Liberal Democrats, Conservatives, and Respect activists, busily going about their leafleting. I saw Nigel Bakhai (the Lib Dem candidate) in his car, and the Labour candidate Virendra Sharma, who walked stright past me without apparently noticing either me or my yellow placard. I am not sure whether his supreme indifference to my brilliance was due to his brain having been implanted with a Blairite filter, blanking out all signs of dissent, or whether it was just because he is only 2 feet tall and presumably couldn't see further up than my knees.

9th July The most exciting day of the campaign so far happened on a day when I wasn't there. Five Labour councillors in Ealing have defected to the Conservative Party, and two of the independent candidates apparently don't want to win any more. Why don't all the other candidates go the whole way and endorse me? Don't they realise that I am the most brilliant and charismatic candidate, with the most sensible policies?

7th July A busy day started with the coincidental timing of the Southall campaign and the third day of the Marxism 2007 Festival happening at the same time. Thus I met the Respect candidate, Salvinder S. Dhillon, at both locations. After being enlightened by Comrade Dhillon about the 1857 Indian Mutiny and the struggle for independence (hampered by the one-sided collaboration of one Mohandas K. Gandhi, among others) we transposed our respective political struggles to the people of Southall. Four hours of walking between Hanwell and the Western boundaries of Southall resulted in a chance encounter with Tony Lit and an exciting plethora of national identities among the shoppers and proletatians of Southall. By the end of the afternoon, I had spoken in Russian and Hindi, been lectured by a disgruntled Indian gentleman about the evils of Polish and Somali immigration, eaten three tasty samosas, experienced the exquisitely delicious phenomenon of Latvian vanilla-flavoured honey muffins, been offered a drink in an Irish pub, and praised enthusiastically by local youngsters for my anti-imperialist policies on the subject of Somalia and Darfur (this sense of elation was enhanced even further by the noteable absence of Lib Dem posters or activists). I rejoice in the peaceful and vibrant co-existence of people from dozens of national backgrounds. Who dares to suggest that multiculturalism doesn't work? Let him come to Southall!

6th July The entire population of the peasants and proletarian strugglers of Ealing Southall constituency erupted into a frenzy of hysteria, and have been dancing, singing and celebrating in the streets all day long, upon hearing the joyous news that the supremely brilliant, charismatic and highly-respected world statesman and Loony politician John Cartwright is going to be a candidate in the forthcoming by-election. "We are all jolly glad, and we can hardly contain our excitement at this great news," said local voter Mrs Madeupname. "The Loony Party is in the vanguard of leading the people of the world towards a bright new world of peace and plenty, fun and festivities, cultural enlightenment and free chocolate biscuits," she continued. All of her family, friends and neighbours were nodding frantically in agreement at her assertion that he would inevitably get more than a thousand times as many votes as all the other candidates put together.


BROMLEY & CHISLEHURST
Thursday 29th June 2006
RESULT:



Bob Neill (Conservative)        11621 (40.0%)
Ben Abbotts (Liberal Democrat)  10988 (37.8%)
Nigel Farage (UKIP)              2347  (8.1%)
Rachel Reeves (Labour)           1925  (6.6%)
Ann Garrett (Green)               811  (2.8%)
Paul Winnett (National Front)     476  (1.6%)
John Hemming-Clark (Independent)  442  (1.5%)
Steven Uncles (English Democrats) 212  (0.7%)
John Cartwright (OMRLP)           132  (0.5%)
Nick Hadziannis (Independent)      65  (0.2%)
Anne Belsey (Money Reform Party)   33  (0.1%)
electorate 71798 : turnout 29052 (41%) Campaign blog
Leaflets

(photographs with kind permission of the Bromley Times)

From left to right: Ann Garrett (Green Party), Nick Hadziannis (Independent), John Cartwright (OMRLP), John Hemming-Clark (Independent), Ben Abbotts (Lib Dem), Steven Uncles (Eng Dem), Charles Joel (Returning Officer), Nigel Farage (UKIP), Anne Belsey (Money Reform Party), Bob Neill (Con), Rachel Reeves (Lab)

John Cartwright denouncing the failures of the Lib-Lab-Con-trick parties

Nick Hadziannis celebrating his enormous total of 65 votes

Campaign blog

28th June Another day of leafleting in Bromley High Street was accompanied by another desperate publicity stunt by the Illiberal Undemocrats - this morning it was the turn of the decadent and failed former leader Charles Kennedy to be wheeled out in between the TV cameras and the ridiculous ubiquitous placards. The future Lord Kennedy had the sense and manners to greet me with enthusiasm, but (for the second time in less than a week) the by-election candidate, the abominable Ben Abbotts, showed his usual contempt for normal people by ignoring me completely. We live in the hope that the people of Bromley and Chislehurst will have the sense to reciprocate in kind by rejecting Mr Abbotts in their thousands tomorrow, and to condemn him to the obscurity which he deserves. In the unlikely event of a Lib Dem victory, it will be to the detriment of the Bromley proletariat to have chosen such a cynical opportunist and opponent of democracy as their representative.
Meanwhile, the desperation of the BBC in trying to find any good qualities in the candidates in the main parties led them to include me twice in their local news coverage at 6:30pm, as it came to pass that I was on television in the background of Mr Kennedy's ridiculous parade, and then again as I paid a good-will visit to the UKIP headquarters while Roger Knapman was being interviewed.

26th June The only public meeting of the campaign so far took place this evening, with a high attendance from the people of Bromley who came to listen to vast reams of down-to-earth common sense being spouted by the Very Simon Heffer of the Daily Telegraph and the Extremely Nigel Farage of the UKIP. This was an example of fraternal co-operation between those who believe in democracy and sovereignty, as I received a positive and warm welcome from those present in response to my question about proportional representation. The openness of those of us who are pro-European (and therefore against the EU) was in contrast with the restrictive and narrow attitudes of the Lib-Lab-Con-trick parties, which are paralysed by the sclerotic tyranny of the law-making process in the EU which, in their blinkered ignorance and self-delusion, they cannot even influence let alone control.

24th June Another successful day of leafleting in Bromley resulted in hundreds of leaflets being received by eager and ecstatic voters, and yielded several pledges of support, including one from a three-week-old baby and one from a mother duck and her eight little chicks who had got wandered out of the park. There was also active campaigning from the Liberal Democrats, the English Democrats and the Green Party, but still no sign of the Conservative and Labour Parties.

22nd June The Bromley Times this week included good coverage of my spectacularly brilliant, popular and successful campaign. However, in a desperate and futile attempt to derail the Onward March to Loony Diversity, the reactionary bourgeois scribblers who infest this crypto-feudalist organ managed to label Comrade Lord Toby Jug as my "election agent" (which he is not) and even as "party leader" (which he is not). Voters who remain loyal to the path of Loonyism can rest assured that these revisionist tactics will not succeed! Such misrepresentations are merely the last gasp of a crumbling decadent oligarchy and its media. My victory in the by-election next Thursday remains inevitable.

21st June While I was handing out leaflets in Bromley High Street today, the Liberal Democrat candidate Ben Abbotts appeared, accompanied by Vince Cable MP and a phalanx of foot-soldiers holding the usual ridiculous "Winning Here" placards. I attempted to do the courtesy of introducing myself to Mr Abbotts and asking for one of his leaflets, but I was physically manhandled by one of his stormtroopers and prevented from getting near. This demonstrates clearly that the so-called "Liberal" so-called "Democrats" are no better than the Labour and Conservative Parties in their frantic desire to manipulate media coverage to their own purposes, and are not interested in the real process of co-operation or collaboration for the common good. Was the way I was treated typical of the Lib Dems' attitude towards other people? Does Mr Abbotts condone the way in which I was obstructed?
Meanwhile, the UKIP was out in force as well, complete with their 1938 battlebus. Perhaps the Conservative and Labour Parties have given up?
The Lib Dem leaflet has a bar chart which shows that (on the basis of local election results) the Lib Dems are in second place behind the Conservatives. The UKIP leaflet also has a bar chart, showing them in second place (based on the European election results). Neither seems to be aware that this is a parliamentary by-election.

20th June Another successful day of leafleting in both Bromley and Chislehurst high streets. There was no sign of any other campaigners from any of the other parties - clearly they have all given up and abandoned all efforts in the face of my stunningly inspirational and spectacularly forward-thinking brilliant policies.

17th June A successful day of campaigning saw dozens of leaflets being distributed to people in Bromley town centre, and a spirit of solidarity spontaneously erupted when Nick Hadziannis lent me his megaphone for a while to broadcast the Loony message. Co-operation between alternative politicians is the way forward! Mutual antagonism between the "main" parties is the way back to the past! Forwards not sideways! Meanwhile, the campaign launch of the English Democrats went off to a spectacular start, with the enormous total of two candidates, one photographer and zero members of the public in attendance. Who says that nobody cares about England? Vote Loony!

15th June Why does this week's Bromley Times not mention me in its coverage of the by-election candidates, despite mentioning three other new candidates? Is it because it is taking my impending victory for granted, due to my brilliance and charisma?

14th June: There are eleven candidate in this by-election. Those who wish to withdraw from the EU have the opportunity to vote Loony; this will provide the benefits of PR(STV) as well as retaining the UK Parliament for the whole country, and the benefits of immigration and multi-culturalism. I urge all patriotic voters to reject the racism of the National Front and the separatism of the English Democrats. Meanwhile, my first day of leafleting was a great success, with a positive reaction from thousands of joyous Bromley peasants who were delighted with the opportunity to vote Loony.

12th June: I delivered my nomination papers this morning and I am now, barring a catastrophe, a candidate in the by-election. I noticed on the TV news that David Cameron was in central Bromley at the same time as I was, but I didn't see him. He must have been scared off by the brilliance of my policies, personality and charisma.

11th June: Nigel Farage says that voters can have "fun" in the by-election by voting UKIP. Why not have the real thing and vote Loony? Then you can get proportional representation anad accountable government as well as national sovereignty.

Leaflet 1 (400 copies) page 1

Leaflet 1 (400 copies) page 2

Leaflet 2 (200 copies) page 1

Leaflet 2 (200 copies) page 2