Waddon by-election 12th February 2009 campaign
Ordinary people can see for themselves the decay, decline, chaos, corruption and despair over which the other parties have presided for 30 years. The people's invigorating demand for a Loony government is resounding, clangorously and triumphantly, across the face of Britain as a death-knell for the stranglehold in which the Lib-Lab-Con-trick parties have held our country for too long. The people are turning in ever greater numbers to the positive message of the Official Monster Raving Loony Party.
The essential character of Loony Party philosophy is one of protest. But it is not a mindless, anarchic, protest against "The State", or "The Ruling Class". It is a protest against the mediocrity and the vascillating mush and slush of the bourgeois politicians who have held the country in a grip of drift and betrayal for the last thirty years. We, the true progressives of the Official Monster Raving Loony Party, do not seek power for ourselves; we want a transformation in the everyday lives of thousands of people without relying on the failed and outdated dogma of the Lib-Lab-Con-trick parties. Whenever the OMRLP contributes to political discourse and debate, prosperity, freedom, diversity and pluralism flourish. The dark areas, to which the light of the OMRLP has not yet reached, are still suffering from a fog of chaos, crime, corruption, and despair.
The old parties seek to maintain their old powers in the old institutions, and to suppress the free spirit and freedom-loving desires of the people, by clinging with increasing desperation to outdated bourgeois distractions such as hierarchy, deference, authoritarianism, and the systematic de-politicisation of the people. The OMRLP alone will cast away such ossification and will re-energise and motivate the people to take an active part in the government of the nation, with equality of prestige of the masses and in solidarity with other nations on the principles of self-determination.
John Cartwright is the glorious leader of the Croydon Branch of the OMRLP, and is universally regarded as one of the most brilliant, charismatic, forward-thinking leaders in the continuing struggle for normal decent common-sense Loony values, and in the fight against the extreme and insane nonsense of the discredited philosophies of the
His first venture onto the political stage was with the Chocolate Fudge Cake Party in the local elections of 1994, when he received the votes of 175 brave pioneers who saw the light and who recognised the need for a mainstream, common-sense party to serve the people of Croydon. In May 1996, John joined the OMRLP and he soon became the Shadow Minister of Chocolate. In the 2001 and 2005 General Elections, he received 408 and 193 votes respectively for the OMRLP in Croydon Central constituency.
He is a member of Topspin (the Official Tim Henman Fan Club) (since 1999), the Electoral Reform Society (since 1995), and the Hands Off China Campaign (since 2008), and was formerly a member of the Constitutional Monarchy Association (1998-2001), the Stalin Society (Dec 2007 to Dec 2008), and the so-called Liberal Party (not the Liberal Democrats) (1999-2001). He attended the conferences of Unite Against Fascism from 2005 to 2008, Marxism 2007, and Marxism 2008 in July 2008. He went to Trinity School, Croydon (1979-87) and Royal Holloway, University of London (1991-95).
My nephew Alfred: