All That I Had:

Elenya waits patiently for Frodo and Sam to appear. Then she waits impatiently, tapping her foot. After twenty minutes she gives up and goes to knock loudly on their bedroom door. Elenya: How long does it take to get your coats on? You said you’d only be a minute. Frodo: I’m sorry, Elenya.We seem to be rather tied up at the moment. Aaaarhhhh. Oh, Sam. Do that again! Sam: Which bit? Frodo: All of it! Do all of it. Aaaarhhhh. Elenya: So you’re not coming to do this speech as promised? Sam: Oh, he’s promising to come all right. Would you mind going away? Elenya (hopefully): Can I come in and take notes? Frodo and Sam: NO!

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I am here tonight to accept this pretigious award on behalf of Frodo and Sam, who are sadly indisposed. What can I say? It was all their idea, I just wrote it down. Don’t thank me, thank them.

Congratulations to Fennelseed for winning this category. Being runner-up for the Honorary Sam Award has given me a huge thrill and I’d like to thank everyone who voted for ‘Standing Still’. I also think Shadow deserves a round of applause for creating the Golden Mushroom Awards, they’ve been a whole lot of fun.

Lastly, a big thank you to J.R.R Tolkien, who gave us sexy hobbits, and who would have been very surprised at what they get up to.