Match Reports

The John Henderson & Sons 2009/2010 Squash Leagues Kicked off last week with wins for the new team Sobelow (ex Peters Fish & Chip) playing newcomers to div one Stewartry CSC. The old stalwarts Finite Engineering won, although the Bard Vet team only had four players due to a late Injury to Davy Rogerson.

In Division two there were wins for Cisco Systems v Stewartry Young Guns (Minus the old cannon John Wilson) and Kings Arms v Anderson Engineering (ex Specksavers) the season got off to a great start, and with more games this year it should be a tight finish

NUNHOLM MASTERS ON THE ROAD AGAIN

A contingent of squash players from Nunholm Squash Club headed to Aberdeen last weekend for the first Scottish Squash tournament of the season, the Stonehaven Masters, and achieved mixed results.

In the over-70s, reigning Scottish champion Davy Rogan got off to a flying start winning both his round-robin matches in straight sets on the Saturday. He continued this form into the semi-final on Sunday morning. In the final he was up against an opponent 6 years his younger and narrowly lost each of the first two sets on the tie-break 10-9. This seemed to take the wind out of him and thus his younger opponent also took the third set to leave Davy runner-up.

In the over-55s, Phil Leek, a relative novice on the Masters circuit, lost his first round match in straight sets and unfortunately fared no better in the plate competition. In the over-50s, Keith Gristwood achieved a good win in his first round match 3-2 but lost to the 2^nd seed in the quarter-final 3-1.

In the over-45s, the club had two participants in the top half of the draw, Jimmy Wells the reigning Scottish champion and Jim Scriven, along with Ronnie Carter from Lockerbie. Both Jim Scriven and Ronnie Carter won their opening matches easily in straight sets setting up a quarter-final match between them. Meanwhile, Jimmy Wells had received a bye in the first round and then due to an injury to his opponent a further bye into the semi-final to play the winner of the inter-D&G match.

This match between Jim Scriven and Ronnie started off edgily and after a few exchanges of service Carter eventually took control of the first game after keeping the pressure on Scriven. The next two games went the way of the first with Carter winning in straight sets to set up a semi-final against Jimmy Wells.

In the semi on Sunday morning, Wells took control of the first game winning relatively comfortably. In the second he took a big lead only for Carter to dig in deep and recover to tie the match 1-1. In the third set, Wells finally took control of the match and won through to the final 3-1.

In the final, Wells was meeting an opponent who had just moved up from the over-40s. Expecting a tough match Wells got into the zone right at the start and took a tough first set. In the second, his opponent sought to get back into the match but Wells was intent to control the game and not let him in and he ended up winning a tight second set. The third set was relatively straight-forward after his opponent became dispirited and thus Jimmy Wells defended his Stonehaven Masters with a 3-0 victory.

Next tournament is the West Masters in a month’s time. Nunholm Squash Club is hosting its inaugural Scottish Squash tournament, the South of Scotland Masters open, in late November.

Squash doubles were all the rage last weekend with the re-introduction of the doubles tournament. The tournament attracted a good turn-out of 8 pairs, slightly down from the original entries due to a conflict with the end-of-season tennis finals day and a home cricket match. Just as well the running club doesn’t meet on a Saturday, as the availability of parking was already acute, and we’d have been parking down on the Edinburgh Rd!

Getting back to our wacky competition; you have to remember that normal squash doubles matches are played on a wider and longer court – yep, you get the picture - four bodies and four rackets on a singles court! Plus for good measure throw in a mix of seasoned doubles pros and raw recruits and watch out……ouch!!

Overheard from a spectator watching one of these spectacles was the astute observation, in a somewhat oblique reference to some puerile Ballyearl antics that once graced our website front page, that “this was the biggest collection of big arses making an arce of themselves on one court he had ever seen”; but I digress….….the revised draw thus consisted of two groups of 4 pairs based on a round-robin format. The first group was led by the “heavy-hitters” duo, and I mean heavy...man, of Jimmy Wells and Paul McCulloch aka the Slag Brothers. Having successfully defeated the efforts of the New Abbey duo of Penelope Pitstop and Peter Perfect, aka Sue Strachan and David Hall, next up on court were the Gruesome Twosome of Peter Allen and George O’Neill. The result - another chequered flag for the Slag Brothers.

Meanwhile the Anthill Mob of Rosanna Piero and Petar Zutic had also inflicted defeats on the Gruesome Twosome and Penelope Pitstop and Peter Perfect setting up a decider for the top spot. It’s first blood to the Slag Brothers, and now we’re into the second and oh!....what a clubbing the Anthill Mob have taken. They think it’s all over – it is now!, and the Slag Brothers have unbelievably have made it to the final.

Back in the pit lane of courts 1 and 2 it was revving up in group 2. Hot favourites in this group after the late withdrawal of The Riddler, hold on that’s another comic strip – Ed., were the pairing of Garry McKean and Phil Leek, aka Dick Dastardly and Muttley, respectively. Facing this villainous duo initially to no avail were the pairing of Rufus Ruffcut and Sawtooth, aka Danny McBryde and Scot Radley. Next up and taking it close into the third were the two Keiths, Martin and Gristwood, aka Sarge Blast and Private Meekly. Next to face Muttley’s sssssssnivelling ssssneer was the combo of Jim Hogg and Chris McCutcheon, aka Prof Pat Pending and The Red Max with them edging it in the third. The other match went to the Keiths and they tied for the top of the table with Dick Dastardly and Muttley, but on the head-to-head evil once again triumphed over good thus setting up a final with the Slag Brothers.

But Muttley had taken the hump….although it’s common knowledge he needs a good hump!...he had previously arranged a league dog-fight match and thus had to be substituted by Ze Red Max for the final. The Slag Brothers were up for it though and took the first tight game. In the second they took, what looked like, an unassailable lead only for Dastardly to pull a few dirty nicks out of his racket and it was one-all. And we’re off…..into the deciding set. The Slag Brothers looked like they were huffing and puffing and on the ropes, with their legs moving quicker than the Anthill Mob’s ever did, but with the set getting closer to its conclusion one last push by Big Slag pushed them over the line to take the chequered flag.

On the podium, they had to be content with their winnings of red wine rather than the customary champers (we are in a recession you know) whilst the runners-up quaffed their prizes of European lager.

Thanks everyone who turned up on the day and participated. Hope you all enjoyed it and see you all next year for another episode of Wacky Races.