The history of the village of
SISSINGHURST 
( Formerly known as *Mylkehouse)
Fictional Fact!
(*...although how you derive "Sissinghurst" from "Mylkhouse" beats us, but that's history for you.)
In fact, "Milkhouse Street" which presumably was the main road through the village,
was renamed Sissinghurst sometime during the 1850's. According to records, such was
the nefarious reputation of the village that a name change was deemed necessary,
probably to avoid blacklisting from the Cranbrook Tourist Information Office!! What
on earth were the residents of Milkhouse Street doing in those days to warrant such
drastic action -
HOWEVER, the Entirely Unofficial Potted History of the village
states the following :-
Around 1300BC some ancient working tools were discovered in the area, giving rise to the possibility of the existence of an early Homebase/B & Q DIY Superstore and some years later (843AD) the Archbishop of Canterbury, capitalising on this discovery, bought up the entire county with a view to filling the church coffers from property development.....
Nevertheless, like all good villages in those days, somebody had to be employed to
keep the peasants in line, and so it was in 1200, Saxenhurst Manor was established
by the Kent County Council and headed up by some South-
One assumes it was his task to ensure that all the banking whizzos at the time were
herded off to Staplehurst Railway Station each working day, in one of Farmer Arriva's
Bullock Carts to catch the 7.30am train to the City. Those fortunate enough to be
given Company Horses, were permitted to stable them in the Station Paddock whilst
the wives were left to freely clog up the muddy tracks in and around the village
in their bright shiny four-
However, this was all well and good until about 1760 when the Manor was renamed Sissinghurst Castle by a handful of French prisoners of war who, whilst attempting to escape forced gardening duties on a Public Holiday, mistakenly thought they were in Colditz.
(nb. It really DOES have a nice garden -
In 1838, the A of C suddenly realised what a bunch of heathens lived in the village and decided to establish a church for the not inconsiderable sum of £1900. Shortly after that, when it was discovered that half his local ecclesiastical staff couldn't read the names on their payslips, he managed to sting the KEC for the princely sum of £350 to build a school. That worked out at about a quid a pupil which was pretty cheap by anyone's budget!! No wonder they all went to Dulwich!!
The only real claim to fame as far as the village is concerned was the purchase,
some years ago, of Sissinghurst Castle by the late Vita Sackville -
There was also THE GREAT HURRICANE of 1987 which caused widespread damage to large
parts of South East England and the resulting blocked roads brought the village to
a virtual standstill -
Apart from that, somebody's old Oak Tree fell over recently, clearly demonstrating
that what goes up generally comes down eventually. But at last, albeit a few hundred
years late, we have our very own Village Sign which it is sincerely hoped, will
remain upright and vandal-
The Unveiling Ceremony 21st October 2000 -
An excellent achievement and congratulations to all involved , even our Terry who cuts the grass round it!
" Ooooh, Marjorie, I think I've pulled !!"""
..And finally, it has been said that should the Ravens leave the Tower of London,
then the City will collapse (or something like that.) -
FOOTNOTE :-
Sadly , Bill passed away on 5th January 2007. He'll be remembered by many and forgotten by none.
In Memorium
“Old Bill “-