Lord Generals Guard drinking on duty

15th April 2006

The Lord General
(C)Rusty Aldwinkle
At the Lord Generals soirée for his commanding officers held at Elvaston Castle this Easter weekend, the honour guard were seen drinking whilst guarding the entrance to the hall. They claimed that the hall's serving wenches kept bringing them glasses of wine and food whilst they stood there on guard.

Musketeer Searle and Pikeman Ponzi when being relieved of duty by the next watch declared that "they didn't want to be relieved, but that the wine had run out". Musketeer Searle then finished a glass of wine he had been drinking whilst on duty.

After the officers group portrait was taken, the guard with a none to steady Pikeman Owrid were formed up to escort Major and Lady Chapple of the Earl of Essex regiment and Major and Lady Crack of Col. Jones regiment back to the camp without much further incident.



Jones's CO goes for a paddle

15th April 2006
A report has come into this journalists hands about an incident that happened during the skirmish on the Saturday morning at Elvaston Castle
On Saturday morning I was given command of London Brigade's Musket division.

Not long into the engagement I sent four musketeers ( 2 Tower Hamlets and 2 Jones' - namely Cpl Vic Andrews and Major Dick Crack - out on reconnaissance duties.

As far as I recall, I instructed Messrs Andrews and Crack to 'Go down that path and look for the enemy' -

At no time do I remember saying
(A) Cross the Danube
 (B) Practice your breast stroke whilst you're at it.. or
(C) Tread water!

I was only aware of Dick's misfortune (Chuckle) when Vic reappeared some time later - after Dave Frampton had done his 'Lady in the Lake' bit and retrieved Dick's sword from the murky depths.

Later investigation revealed that Dick and Vic had made their way down the path and found the river, stream, call it what you will. Vic crossed first with no problem, sadly, Dick wasn't so lucky. It is worth remembering that Dick turned 49 the previous day and Vic turned 61 the week before! Read into that what you will.

We are currently looking for one of those 10m Swimming Test patches so Dick can stitch it to his breeches.

Officer of the day - London Brigade Musket Division
Dick Crack, CO of Jones's Regiment
File Photograph